Nothing too exciting happened in terms of releases this past week, but plenty seems to be going on at Coachella. In case you’ve been living under a rock, Coachella Valley Music and Arts Festival is an annual music festival held in California. Every year, during the second and third weeks of April, anyone who’s anyone in the entertainment industry pops up at Coachella to play, party and have a good time. And every year in April, the news is bombarded with stories about Coachella craziness. So, what’s happening at Coachella 2015?
Madonna’s Making Out with Drake
Yes, you read that correctly. Madonna’s 56-year-old mouth attacked Drake’s face onstage during their dual performance. At first, Drake appeared into the smooch. That is, until he realized he’d been kissed by lips manufactured in 1958. After a bit of squirming, Drake was released from the pop matron’s mouth trap and was caught on tape looking rather disgusted with the whole thing – as anyone subjected to such torture would be. However, Drake said after-the-fact that it wasn’t Madonna’s crusty, old kiss that was gross but the lipstick she was wearing. Sure it was, Drake. Sure it was.
Rihanna’s Not Snorting Cocaine
The Coachella drama continued today when Rihanna posted a video on Instagram of she and some friends partying it up in some kind of private suite. The video features a nameless girl dancing and RiRi sitting at a table fiddling with drugs. Though it’s not clear what kind of substance Rihanna is handling in the video, anyone with access to WiFi and a keyboard rushed to social media to accuse the pop star of snorting cocaine. And RiRi was not happy. According to an Instagram comment by the singer, “any fool could see that’s a joint” she’s rolling in the short clip. I don’t know what Rihanna’s rolling, smoking, or snorting but I wouldn’t be surprised if she was doing all three, especially at Coachella. Whatever she decides to do with her brain cells in her spare time is of no concern or consequence to me.
Justin Bieber’s Being Booted
Train sang “even Bieber ain’t forever,” yet it seems that news about him just won’t stop circulating. As if smooching and snorting weren’t enough, America’s most hated legal adult has now been thrown into the Coachella craziness. TMZ released a video yesterday of a blurry, blonde figure labeled as the Biebs being rushed from a crowd of screaming people. TMZ explains that Justin tried to get into the “artists area” in order to watch Drake’s performance but the security guards wouldn’t let him through, despite him having the wristbands needed to gain access. After arguing with the guards, a Coachella staff member began to escort Bieber in. He never made it, as security allegedly put Bieber in a chokehold in attempt to keep him from entering. Justin was asked to leave the festival after a scuffle involving both his and Coachella’s security teams. I didn’t get any of that from the shotty video of out-of-focus figures but, if the internet says so, it must be true. ◼︎