Mia Ruhoff
Staff Reporter
Self love is not selfish. It is easy to dismiss this phrase as just an idyllic caption found only on some cat poster or Pinterest quote collection, but this idea is so much more than a pretty phrase.
So how should this statement be interpreted? Perhaps it refers to the importance of having self love in our lives.
Self love is a daunting concept. How does one truly love themself? Is it vain to do so?
It is a lot harder to do than it ought to be. It is a long, arduous journey, and not everyone is able to reach the endpoint.
Instead of viewing self love as some impossible path, a landpost that moves farther and farther away the closer you get to it, we should view self love as a relationship: a relationship with ourselves.
It is impossible to like every single aspect about another person, but it is possible to see another person’s flaws yet still love them.
Everyone is bound to make mistakes, but we can forgive them in most cases. Do we not owe the same empathy and respect to ourselves?
It is alright to be lazy, to be sad, to make mistakes. It is alright to need to push away other people and obligations to just make time for yourself. You are only human. Be no harder on yourself than you would on those you love and care for.
Self love or at least, self respect and trust is essential to being able to healthily take care of other people and pursue your goals. But how do we reach self love? Redefining our definition of it is only a start. This is where self care comes in.
Self care is also a daunting prospect. It is helpful to keep in mind that this is a process just like self love. Taking small steps before making grand changes is key to not overwhelm yourself. Here are some suggestions:
- Select a favorite accessory to add to an outfit, no need to have a specific reason. It could make you feel good just to wear it, and maybe others will compliment your outfit which tends to feel good.
- If it works with your schedule, try to switch shower/bathing times to when you are not trying to rush to another event. Even if there is no change to how long the shower/bath is, it can be a relaxing time especially if you aren’t stressed about making it to another event on time.
- Take at least thirty minutes, before bed if possible, to just do something of your own choice. It is alright if this ends up being just lying in bed. You worked hard, and are entitled to not spend every waking hour productively.
Really, just about any action taken for oneself is helpful in building healthy self care habits.
Taking care of yourself—no matter the size of the action—is key to preventing burnout. Whether we can see it ourselves or not, every single one of us has something truly unique to offer to the world.
You matter. You are doing enough, whatever that looks like. You are not selfish for needing to put yourself first at times. We should all work to prioritize ourselves more, because self love is not selfish.
